Hope After Miscarriage & Infant Loss
by Kaitlyn Mason
I can’t imagine going through a miscarriage. I can’t imagine delivering a child who has gone to Heaven. I can’t imagine losing an infant. I can’t imagine going through these things because I have not gone through these things. Not yet anyways.
While I’m grateful that is my reality, I know that for so many people out there, loss is their reality. And my heart and my prayers go out to them.
What can we do to bring these families comfort and healing? What can we say?
Sometimes we will not have the right words, but that doesn’t mean that we should be silent.
Every life has value, dignity, and worth. Every life has a God-ordained purpose. And letting grieving families know that you love them is important.
But I’m getting ahead of myself.
Look, honestly? I’ve been the one to say nothing when someone was grieving after perinatal loss of a child. I’ve been afraid to say the wrong thing. But fear or love: that is the question, right?
Sometimes the news is shared in a hush hush kind of way that makes it feel like you shouldn’t even know about it in the first place. What do you do? What do you say to the family then? Sometimes people aren’t ready to let others know about their loss until years afterwards, and then the news makes its way around. What do you do? What do you say to the family then? Sometimes you aren’t close with the grieving family and reaching out can seem awkward. What do you do? What do you say to the family then?
I don’t have the answers that’s for sure. This is one area of my life right now where God is kinda’ working on me… molding me into someone who will respond to these situations in a way that is loving and in accord with His will.
I don’t have the answers about how to respond to perinatal loss of a child, but people who’ve been there? They have some suggestions.
I recently watched a DVD called “Footprints on Our Hearts: Walking through grief after a miscarriage, stillbirth, or newborn death.” Its target audience is grieving parents, though it includes a special segment for friends and family called “At a Loss for Words.”
And as I heard these women and men tell their stories, I realized something: God is right there in the midst of grief.
People who have lost a child have suffered on this earth. They have suffered in ways that words will never fully capture. But this DVD shares the paths by which several Mothers and Fathers found hope again.
They learned how to incorporate their lost children into their daily thoughts and prayers. They learned how to walk loved ones and children through the grieving process alongside them. They learned how to turn their suffering over to God – in exchange for hope.
I learned from their words in this DVD that it is always better to reach out, always better to try to love and comfort, always better to acknowledge the beautiful child who is now lost to Heaven – than it is to do and say nothing.
If you know someone who has gone through a miscarriage, stillbirth, or death of a newborn, I feel you can benefit from watching this DVD.
Surely, these individuals will be forever changed after their losses, and they will have much to endure in this world. It is important that we are sensitive to their loss and to their needs without remaining silent. Purchasing this DVD for a loved one would be one gesture of care that may ultimately provide some hope for their journey.
If you have experienced perinatal loss of a child, first of all, my whole heart goes out to you. Second, consider purchasing this DVD or asking for it as a gift. I feel that you will find these people speaking in the video are people who understand you.
I highly, highly recommend that this DVD be purchased and viewed by care centers looking to provide support to grieving women. It would make a wonderful tool for staff training, and it is one that could also be shown to support groups of women and men seeking healing after their losses.
May we all grow closer to Christ who gives and takes away. And may we all learn from each other – especially from those precious loved ones who leave little footprints on our hearts.
P.S. God is merciful and He loves you! Pass it on…
Copyright 2016 Kaitlyn Mason